The past few days have been rough, but God has sent me wonderful reminders that He hasn’t left me. Jacob my youngest who doesn’t notice much came to me Sunday night after I about fell in the garage, “mama God has been good, every time you are about to fall there is something there to catch you.” Saturday I felt great tired by the end of the night but great, Sunday I was a falling mess, and Monday was no better. Monday is one of the days I work out, I use this term lightly, because its low impact and I have to make a lot of adjustments but I am moving. About 20 minutes before it was time to go the floor and I met, there wasn’t anything t catch me that time, and I wasn’t hurt but I was mad. Mad at the circumstances that are right now, mad that at 43 my legs aren’t working like I think they should, and just down mentally and physically. I did go work out, but it took everything I had to not fall, I had to focus so much on my ,movements to make sure that my body was doing what my brain was telling it to do because my legs were going in and out with numbness.
Today I have a full day of Dr visits, and some car sitting because its too much to drive back home, just to turn back to fort mill. I will get my eye checked out, and have blood work, and all that checked out today, to follow up with Dr. Judge on Thursday. I am not worried but unsettled, and I know that I am putting more faith into. Amyloidosis then I am into Jesus. Sundays sermon at Liberty was just what my heart needed!!
So where is my reminders in all this, Sundays sermon came right now on time for me, it reminded me when I am not trusting Jesus I am saying that Amyloidosis is too big for Him, too much for Him to handle. Jacob who never notices anything, noticed the falling, and recognized God in all of it. I have a great group of friends, who just know when things are off, and just check in in what would seem like random moments. God is here, He hasn’t left me in all this, and I know He will be with me today.