The advisory board I did a few weeks back made a scrapbook of comments and things we did over the 4 days we met. This is one of my parts in the book and it just resonates with me why. Some days are great, and I can almost forget that Amyloidosis is part of my life, and other days it’s so dark I can’t see my hand in front of me. There are very few in between days. Right now as I writing this my legs are completely numb from the knee down and I am afraid to get up because no one is here if I fall. But for the past 4 hours I was finishing notes for our Tuesday night study on Jeremiah, and it doesn’t matter what my circumstance is, because God never changes. This picture here is what I need to remember when it gets so dark I can’t see, that the color doesnt come from me but from Him, and He is constantly holding me up when I can’t stand. This journey that He has me on, is all about bringing glory to Him. I don’t know who was a believer on the board and who wasn’t but they will have this book, and have this reminder that God brings color back in the dark! Amazing! My prayer is that I always remember that, my prayer is that I see the color and not the dark, my prayer is that God uses this journey, He uses me. We sang a song in church on Sunday, (called available) and I got lost in the words. God and I just having a conversation because I mean these words….
“Narrow as the road may seem, I’ll follow where Your Spirit leads, broken as my life may be, I will give you every piece, I hear You call, I am available….Here I am with open hands, counting on your grace again, less of me and more of You, oh I just wanna see You move, I hear Your call, I am available…..Here I am, here I am, You can have it all, You can have it all…”
Yes! You can have it all!!!! Here I am, use me!